Banana Keeper saves civilization

I was fooling around today on Starfucker's myspace (one of the many activities I enjoy whilst pretending to work) when I was suddenly struck by a mysterious picture sitting just below the "Sounds Like" heading. What was this strangely phallic object? Why, it was the miraculous invention known as the Banana Keeper!

Apparently banana protection is a problem for the general public as there are multiple variations on this bizarre product ranging from the goofy to the overtly dildo-esque.

No longer will our bananas be subject to inopportune bruising. No longer will my repressed homosexuality have to be manifest itself through repeated viewings of Bromance. The age of the Banana Keeper is upon us!

For the win! Esquire on MTV's Bromance

Since witnessing the awesome trainwreck that is the new MTV reality show Bromance, more appropriately titled Douchebag Seeking Douchebag, I've been preparing to unleash a hateful screed bemoaning the recent slate of basic-cable reality show males.

That's still in the works. (Also of note: VH1's Tool Acadamy.)

For now, I direct you to Esquire's Blog of Lists, which perfectly eviscerates the horrible, horrible Bromance.

A telling quote:

"bro•mance \bro-'man(t)s\ n : (1) the complicated love and affection shared by two straight males, often exhibited through physical acts such as wrestling, playing sports, and half-hugging. Ex: "Shut up, Monica! Chandler and I share a bromance that you'll never understand!"

vb : (1) The act of going to unusual lengths in order to woo a male friend. Ex: "Jeff from accounting hasn't accepted my friend request, so my plan is to bromance him with some Knicks tickets."

proper n : (1) MTV's new reality television show starring The Hills alumnus Brody Jenner as a d-bag man searching for a fellow d-bag man to join his posse of friends, through a process involving intimate chats and outrageous physical challenges, the likes of which manage to achieve a level of unintentional homoeroticism not reached since the Grecian Olympic era of girded loins."