Thursday, February 19, 2009

Retarded Fox news anchor gets verbally owned by the mayor of Lansing

Vikings need to find identity starting tonight



The Portland State men’s basketball team entered this season with high and expected expectations. And it seemed that all those expectations were going to be true to form for instance when the team beat Gonzaga on the road and got off to a 6-1 Big Sky conference start. However the Vikings have lost 4 out of their last 6 and getting to March Madness for a second year in a row seems doubtful.



All year the team has been clinging to the words of energy and effort. I believe that more times than not both of those ingredients have been there for the Vikings. However what is missing for this team is consistency and an identity.

The team has struggled to find a dominant scorer to rely on day in and day out. Phil Nelson is defiantly not that scorer; he has not scored in double digits in the last four games.

It seems that Jeremiah Dominguez senses this lack of consistency and is putting the team’s performance on his shoulders. But there is too much talent on this team for one player to carry. Jamie Jones can score in the paint, and Andre Murray can be an aggressive scorer only when he wants to be.

Fact of the matter is that that Vikings are in a rare position to build an established identity this late into a season. I think coach Bone believes it and is banking on the fact that his team can build momentum into the conference tournament. Only problem is that the result of trying to prove something this late can either work out brilliantly or fail miserably.

Tonight against Northern Colorado will be the first chance for PSU start playing with consistency and a changed identity.

Posted by Tom Sedun, Vanguard staff

Blazers should stand pat


Apparently with not much time left in the NBA trade deadline your Portland Trail Blazers will not shake things up and acquire a big name player in hopes for an earlier than expected championship run.

Don’t get me wrong, I would love to see a player like Richard Jefferson from Milwaukee or Gerald Wallace of Charlotte in a Trail Blazer uniform; however I am already more than satisfied with the current progression of the team and the small deals that puts money in the Blazers pocket.

The ‘Zers are fourth in the west and will mostly likely only have to beat out one other team in order to reach the playoffs, which was the only goal for this year.

Pulling a deal before the deadline is a HUGE risk. For instance Phoenix changed the entire face of their franchise by acquiring Shaquille O’Neal at the deadline last year in a desperate attempt for a championship. Where did that lead them you ask? It ended with a first round exit by the Spurs, two different coaching changes, and the eighth highest payroll in the league.

What I am getting at is that the Blazers should not become desperate for a championship. Portland is the second youngest team in the league and has improved by strides with the talent that they have. Now I’m not saying that Blazers should not go after and get a player that can help this franchise.

There is a time and a place for everything. The time to make a move is this summer in the offseason. Kevin Pritchard and the rest of his brain trust crew should spend the rest of this season and evaluate the players we have carefully and then target one player this summer and go after him with force.

Posted by Tom Sedun, Vanguard staff

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Fainting goats



I have never seen anything as hilarious as this.

The Best Oscar preview yet

In this week, the one before the Oscars, many a publication have taken to rehashing and discussing the nominated films, mostly revealing nothing new or exciting. (We get it, "Slumdog Millionaire" is likely to be a big winner.)

But n+1, a literary mag out of New York, took a different approach. They pretty much hate everything, it seems, only not really. That's a worldview I can get behind.

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

In a series of bad dreams, Brad Pitt combines with Forrest Gump, E.T., Oliver from The Brady Bunch, the baby from Eraserhead, Tom Waits album covers, Dr. Zhivago, Dick Cheney/Donald Rumsfeld, on and on, like robot locusts eating the inside of the movie theater in three hours."

Link: n+1 magazine

Monday, February 16, 2009

Joaquin's Mockumentary?

First we were shocked at Joaquin Phoenix's announcement that he was leaving the acting business. Then we were further confused as we learned he was calling it quits in order to put his passion for music into high gear, hip-hop music to be exact.

Oh, then came the videos. First the Las Vegas shots of him floundering about on stage, eventually falling off. Then his charismatic presence on Letterman caught all of our attention. It seems Phoenix is pushing the weirdness factor a bit more the further he goes.

Though word on the street is that we all might be victims of a well played hoax. You see Phoenix's brother-in-law Casey Affleck anounced his directorial debut recently for a documentary he was filming. The subject of said documentary, you guessed it, Phoenix's hip-hop career. A few hollywood lightbulbs went on over the heads of critics, bloggers and other folks who generally don't have much of a life. Could Phoenix's crazy antics be at the expense of a mockumentary in the making? I guess we will all just have to wait and see.

So what do you think? Has Joaquin Phoenix boarded the crazy train or are we all falling for perhaps one of the greatest jokes in hollywood history?

Friday the 13th - Rent it but it still may not be worth the $4

“We’re all just daddy issues and douche bags. Can’t we all just be one happy cliché?”

You said it token stoner dude.

I saw Friday the 13th last weekend on Friday the 14. Yeah that’s right, my lady is awesome. However, as most would expect, the film did not meet up to any of even the smallest of expectations, and produced a series of crimes that horror movie fans will be bringing the gavel down upon.

The film strays so far from the original’s feel, only borrowing the concept of a scary guy in a hockey mask, that fans of the original will be disappointed as it fails to hold up to its 1980 counterpart. All in all, this remake is a mix of first two Friday the 13ths. For those who are in-the-know, they should be able to spot a few nostalgic moments such as Jason’s bag mask as well as others.

But the sprinkling of nostalgia doesn’t carry the film through an array of poor film-making choices. Granted, the initial flick helped to establish some time honored horror movie clichés, but the remake takes these clichés to an embarrassing level, where there is no decent script, twists or turns, or inventive characters. Granted it is hard to pull off a remake, especially when it is of a well-loved franchise, but this remake gave me the feeling that they didn’t even try to create anything successful and banked on the curiosity of fans to garner ticket sales (big surprise).

The movie comes stock with all the drugs, sex and token characters as any other film. So much that it removes any of the original’s feel, yet still leaves the viewer with a sense that they have seen this all before, in the hundreds of horror movies to come since the original in 1980. You don’t have to make some novel work of art, but at least put some creative and innovative thought into it, especially while handling the re-imaging of a delicate classic.

Lastly, on a personal level, the star of the film, Jared Padelecki, appears to be quite a tall drink of water, and not only do you got him on a little Royal Enfield motorcycle, you dubbed over the bike, making it sound like a beefed up Harley. Come on! Couldn’t you just fork up the dough and got the guy on a Triumph? Padelecki looks like a circus clown on a scooter.

Interesting tidbit: Over the past four years Jared Padelecki and Jensen Ackles have come into homes across America each week via the television show Supernatural. To be honest, I do like the show and how each episode is like a mini horror movie. I was therefore intrigued when both actors would be coming to the big screen this year. Coincidentally, both actors were cast in remakes of classic ‘80s horror movies, My Bloody Valentine and Friday the 13th. And not only that, though Ackle’s Bloody Valentine remake came out first, Padelicki’s remake came out on Valentine’s Day! Whoa …